lauramyer.com blog

As you know, I make some funny scenarios out of situations, to try to bring humour to them and see things from a completely different perspective. To write about some crazy stuff, is my own form of psychology as well as being able to laugh about a situation.

Sometimes there’s things about Victoria that push me to get up and be strong and to forget about myself.

She reminds me of a little chook that’s out in the dark and the rain, that’s if nobody puts her in the chicken coop safely of a night.

I say to myself “oh darn, I have to go out and get this chicken in the coop”. I feel like I have to go out in the dark, put on a raincoat and all, and get her and pop her in the door and say “there you go, in ya hop!”

Victoria has a vulnerability about her that you can’t help but want to protect, when you hear what she has been through. I know very well there are foxes out there, and monsters too.

I certainly hope that we can stand together to protect eachother, and see eachother achieve our goals.

Victoria has put a deposit down to do a tantric course. She knows that she has a soft landing here if things don’t work out. I will also need her help down the track to help me get to where I want to be and find some support too.

It’s a tough industry and both of us feel it’s very difficult to just go and work in a parlour. Victoria has told me some terrible things that go on.

In one parlour, if the women take drugs and zonk themselves out, the owners carry the sleeping woman to a park bench and leave her there.

I myself can not handle the abrasive attitudes within some parlours and Victoria feels the same.

Anyway, let’s hope we pull together.

For those of you who have had an enjoyable day today, please try to remember friends you know, who’s marriages have split up. May I make a suggestion? A phone call tonight or visit with some beer and your time would do wonders.

Men are very vulnerable to depression when their family unit falls apart. They face unbearable pain if the children are no longer warm to them because of the ex poisoning their minds or law courts making it tough. Please try to put yourselves in your friends shoes.

Today could be one of the most painful for some men who feel it should be a time of joy.

Your gift of time (and beer) could be all he needs to help him get through today. Please don’t advise him he needs a psychologist or a prescription for ‘cheer up’ pills. All he needs is your friendship.

Coming from an escort who hears these stories on a regular basis, I see and hear what you may not, or what might not be recognised in our community.

Many thanks

Laura

Have you come across a soul mate that you shared some time with?

I met mine years ago. But I was not ready at all, to settle down with him. I had to find myself on a personal journey, as well as having a hunger for a sense of adventure.

And I could not really live with him anyway. But the concept of living without him, has felt like madness to me. He feels the same. However, I never signed up for monogamy and that created too much damage within the relationship. Monogamy is not natural to me (or you too! Otherwise you wouldn’t be on the net reading an escort’s blog!)

There has always been much forgiveness on both parts. But it seems like a love story gone wrong, mainly because I wanted to sail unchartered waters within my mind.

I wanted to sail dangerous seas. Why I had to do this, I can not explain.

My work for me, was navigating unchartered waters. Within a corrupt industry, I navigated so that I created a nurturing haven and also integrity in order to not run into trouble. Also to tackle the psychology behind sexuality and to promote it, is incredibly dangerous. Far more dangerous than just setting yourself up as a private worker. With little support, I do not feel I can tackle it further right now. Not at the moment, but maybe in time (that’s why the book isn’t out yet).

Even if I pair up with somebody else, I will always wonder about this soul mate.

I think this is normal in the mind’s of many people who crossed paths with a soul mate, then find it didn’t work out. They are left wondering about the person for years. They still pine for them but it just did not happen the way they had hoped.

Lucky for us, we get plenty of chances. So perhaps in the next life?

Do you feel you have met people in this lifetime from your ’soul-group’?

I feel there are people who are part of my soul group, but this is not in my own family setting. I feel alien within my family and for me, it was not an emotionally safe haven. Rather it seemed challenging. Our guidance was more in the form of chastisement - “You should’ve known better than that!” But that only reflects the level of members within my family, of their own personal evolvement. I’m sure everyone in my family has done their best.

There is much forgiveness within family relationships. And I remember during the times that we were all close and happy, there was the feeling that you hardly needed anyone else. You stood together and nothing could come against you. Now, the relationships are strained. Not because of my work, but because of different viewpoints and disagreements where lines were crossed, that should NOT have been crossed. Still forgiveness is there but not the same trust and emotional security. It’s hard to restore that.

How many people have an ideal family anyway?

It’s so important that words are never used to tear one another apart. It’s very important that different viewpoints are respected and seen as something we can all learn from instead. Also that boundaries are totally respected. If the boundaries are crossed, then people feel violated. Boundaries such as a young girls personal diary being read and being made fun of. Boundaries as far as walking in on someone when they are showering. Simple little things that are highly important in family relationships.

My cousin called this week out of the blue. Previously she had disassociated herself from me because of my work. Being dumped by a cousin was a sword right in my heart. But it was not discussed, and there was forgiveness on my part, and her overlooking my work and accepting me as a person.

I really do pine for my soul group. If I volunteered to be a part of this family, then at this stage, I am not sure of the lessons that I wanted to know. Are the lessons acceptance? Forgiveness? Unconditional love when I do not connect?

It’s not all that odd to have a family such as mine. Many people all over the world are in the same boat. And instead of choosing a negative path, it makes sense to me that we are here to learn something on a greater level that requires a loving approach. That takes courage! Also to recognise that we like a challenge. If it was all perfect and smooth sailing, we would grow bored.

Did any of you tune into the new show Taken Out?

I watched it to observe the psychology of it. The women could have been less brutal, I thought.

Something I wrote about on my blog quite some time back, popped up on the show last night. The young girl who they paired up the contestant with, had actually worried why the other women did not favour him enough. As I mentioned, women worry how other women feel about their new beau. Instead of making a judgment for themselves, that he may be a very nice guy, they have to get the approval of other women or their girlfriends.

People are not taught to think for themselves. Even when it comes to relationships.

Many of us don’t exist in ideal families. It seems to be disappointing, but we accept that that’s just the way it is.

In the next lifetime, I am going to choose a mother who will be my best friend. I would love that sort of relationship. If people have that, I think they are very fortunate. While they have it, it’s hard for them to imagine life not having that special relationship.

You do overlook these things with your parents, and still have a sense of forgiveness that they could not offer you the relationship you pine for. We tend to accept that the older generation, were just not friends with their children, but were stern figures. I think children want this, even after they have even grown up and become adults.

Fathers who are close to their daughters, are more likely to keep them from being promiscuous. If they have their father close to them, they don’t need to look for it in other men. But if you try to control your daughter and dictate that she is not allowed to do this and that, or hang around boys, she will more than likely rebel and sneak out the window anyway. You will have a tougher job on your hands than if you are a steady friend who is always there.

You can be ‘there’ in spirit, even long distance over the phone, text messages, emails. That gives a person the sense you are there, and it’s enough.

How many people really suffer this condition? How much success is there in overcoming it?

I myself will get restless legs at night - IF I drink too much coffee. So usually in the mornings, I can have upto 3. I can’t have any coffee after midday as it affects my sleep. If I go beyond this, then sure enough, at night time, I will get the restless legs. And it’s very annoying.

I think we have to tune into our bodies which tell us something is ok or something else that we do, is not ok.

Some good dvd’s I recommend are:

From Dural Library
- Michael Palin - Sahara
- The Planets

From Dural Video Easy
- Gay Sex in the 70s
- Documentary on Deep Throat (and how the porn industry exploded overnight)

I don’t think this lifestyle is ‘normal’ at all. Many men now, are working 6 days a week. They are striving to keep afloat. That will only last so long before they reach breaking point, and collapse. These men are not married either. They are divorced or single, and have had a child to a woman and are now paying maintenance.

If you are a single male who has not yet had children, really really think about it carefully and whether you will be able to support yourself, and a child who you may only get to see once a week. There are no guarantees with relationships, even though at the time, we felt so certain nothing could go wrong.

Even when I was married, I gave it careful thought and decided not to. I don’t have any regrets myself, as I was not really hungering to be a mother. I am glad as I am free to live anywhere I like. Otherwise I would have had to stay in Sydney, and live nearby my ex husband, and always have to have contact with him. We strived to be friends, but just do not see eye to eye which causes unnecessary stress.

Victoria mentioned how she is now really thinking about whether she wants motherhood or not. She also spoke to a lady who was 73 and this woman told her that she too, did not have children and does not regret it.

I see how many men have to make great sacrifices now. And they often surrender and don’t put up too much of a fight as far as the house goes and paying maintenance. They try to go with the flow, and suffer in silence. Other’s can fight back and get so exasberated in court and they still lose.

Consider children very very carefully.

Another good dvd from Dural Library was ‘Michael Palin - Sahara’.

Really good to have my eyes opened on the way other people live, especially surrounding the Sahara Desert.

By pulling together and each person doing their part, they prepare the food and sit and eat together. I was thinking how simple their life is, but under harsh conditions. The sand blows constantly and they have to cover up their faces to stop the sting on their faces and eyes.

Our younger generation, get onto the internet to connect with other people within a community setting. But sometimes who they are connecting with, and the cause may not always be real life.

We are so advanced, yet community is diminishing. We don’t have that sense of belonging within a group or tribal setting. If things go wrong in our life, we are often on our own, while people within the community surrounding us, carry on as usual and are likely to consider us ‘depressed’ as though we should pop a pill. Unless a few individuals that we have known over the years, really go out of their way to reach out to us, and some people are fortunate to have such friends.

I myself think that life should be just so simple and basic. It’s enough to pick our food out of the ground, prepare it together and sit down and eat. Basic shelter is good enough. The founders of this country had that. But what did they lack? Why were they still not tight in their relationships? They did lack a spiritual viewpoint to a degree even though they had good morals and values. What has made us so isolated?